Thankful Tuesday's- My Husband's Heart

Today as I sit here thinking of a looooong list of thing's I am thankful for only one of those sticks out as the thing I am most thankful for today! 

I am most thankful today for my husband's heart!!! I am thankful for everything about him, but today it is his heart that has captured my attention. Often times I allow little irritation's and small offense's cloud my vision of who my husband really is. I am blessed with a good man.  He may do thing' s that irritate me and we certainly don't always agree on everything, but when it comes to the thing's that matter there is no reason to complain. 

Jonathan is 100% on board with raising our children in a godly, loving home. He's dedicated to the heart's of our daughter's and seeing that they are guarded and protected until the day he gives them away. He works hard with me to instill morals and values in them and is so unbelievably patient and gentle. I admit that even at times he is the one calming me down and reminding me to speak gently.

 He loves the Lord with every single inch of his heart, no one can take the place of God in his life. He lives a life full of thank's to God for his many undeserved blessing's and remind's us all often that God owes us nothing, he already gave it all. No matter the storm or the anguish he hold's tight to God and doesn't waver. Jonathan also long's for a pure heart. I am blessed to be married to a man that has requested that I don't request Victoria Secret catalog's because he will see them in the mail. He refuse's to put before his eyes any unclean image and I've been with him 9 years and have not seen him falter. He won't so much as look at a lady on tv in a bathing suit. He takes purity seriously and thus will help instill that in our children because it is something he is passionate about. He takes his walk with God so very seriously and has a reverent fear of God, which is a vital  aspect of a relationship with Christ. Jonathan also has a heart full of laughter and is always making me and everyone else around us laugh. I do more laughing than anything else.

 Finally, for whatever reason, his heart beats for mine. That man has forgiven much and loved much even when it is completely undeserved. He gives out the same unconditional love that God has given him and without question or a clause. I don't have to do anything to earn his love, he just loves me in all of my mess and imperfections. It is like he see's something in my heart I don't see myself. 

I can't forget that it was also this loving heart that took the time to befriend a lost soul in college and lead her to the cross. Yes, my husband is the one who led me to truly and wholeheartedly with understanding, commit my life to Christ. 

Incase you don't know already, the below video is my husband. :)

Word of God Speak: Jonathan Cox with True Change Band 

What are you thankful for on this Tuesday?

A Laundry Pile Prayer

Even in the midst of chaos, God offer's peace!

Today is Monday. It is raining, incredibly dreary outside and freezing! Only in NC do you have two day's of warm ( near 70's) weather with sunshine and then wake up to 40 degree weather. My girl's are very fussy and crabby. I have yet to figure out why Monday can be such a battle with them.
All I figure is that they are tired from Sunday, they miss daddy because he went back to work and their routine was thrown off the day before and they don't do well with that. Whatever the reason, today with them has been tough. Addison is teething 4 teeth at once *yes* and she tend's to be mean when she's teething. She isn't cuddly and pitiful, she's angry at the world. Ava Grace woke up on the wrong side of the bed and has been growling today when she doesn't like something. We have been emphasizing the importance of respecting one another and what God's word say's about respecting parents and those in authority, growling at people really doesn't say "respect." I've spent a lot of time correcting the growling and explaining how we should deal with anger and disappointment in a way that doesn't involve sounding like a rabid dog.  Of course because both of them are crabby and irritable they have spent the majority of the day fighting and whining with each other. I was facing four loads of laundry when I got up this morning so I feel like in-between breaking up fight's, cleaning up messes, wiping tears and giving time out's all I've done is wash, dry and fold laundry.  All of this leaves me one frazzled, weary and frustrated mommy.


Can you other mommy's relate?? (Please say yes!) I have had to ask the Holy Spirit to redirect my thought's and my attitude a LOT today. I've asked God to trade my frustration for thankfulness and my irritable attitude for joy. He answered, every time.

Isn't it wonderful, being able to stop and pray and instantly feel the peace and strength of God? The situation's haven't changed, my kid's still teething while the other one growl's at me, but I have HIS peace and I'm being sustained. Like the picture I am surrounded by chaos, but I'm in my own little world filled with his presence. (Praise music really does have a powerful effect if you can listen to it) What an amazing gift to be able and convene with the God of the universe and his Holy Spirit right here in my kitchen. Sometime's I forget what a privilege that is! What is even more mind boggling is that Almighty God cares about me in my little kitchen, he hears me and answer's my cry. My need for peace and a change of attitude isn't too small or mundane a task for him. I am his daughter and I matter to him, my need is important to him. So weary mommy, be encouraged today! God hear's your plea from the laundry pile, the room full of toys or the sink full of dishes. He hear's you and he stand's ready to answer you and fellowship with you. Walk with him, talk with him even as you go through the day to day. He cares and he loves you!

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7

"For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need." Hebrews 4:15-16 (an absolute favorite!)

"Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken." Psalm 55:22

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30

Do you care?

What is with this saying, "I don't care what anyone think's about me." ? I hear that all too often and it is worded in various ways.  I've also seen people be really rude and then say "what? I don't care what people think!" I've been guilty of it myself in the past. My almost four year old's favorite phrase is "I just don't care." Boy that's been fun to correct. I've never liked the saying in question and then today I heard it again and this time Holy Spirit immediately brought to my mind Ephesians 5:1 and I knew, he was trying to tell me something.

I don't think, that as christians we should buy into that way of thinking. We represent a BIG God. For some people we are all the Jesus they will ever see on this earth. Have you ever heard this quote by Brennan Manning, DC Talk used it in their song "What if I stumble," "The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians, who acknowledge Jesus with their lips, then walk out the door, and deny Him by their lifestyle." If we walked around with the mentality of not caring what people think about us then it will effect our actions and lifestyle.  

As Christians we shouldn't worry about what people think of our clothes, the cars we drive, the homes we live in or anything else of material value. The quote does fit on the end of that mentality. We shouldn't be consumed about what other's think about us to the point that we are numb with fear and can't do the work of the Lord. You know what I mean, like when God want's you to speak to a room of people and you suddenly forget how to talk. That is a different topic for a different day. I digress. 

In Ephesians 5:1 it say's "Imitate God therefore, in everything you do, because you are his dear children." -  Imitate: 1. To follow or endeavor, to follow as a model or example. 2. To mimic, impersonate. 3. To make a copy of, reproduce closely. 4. To have or assume the appearance of, simulate, resemble. 

We absolutely need to worry about what people think of us because of who's name we claim to follow! One of my favorite scripture is Hebrews 12:1 "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles…" We are surrounded by witnesses. Every place you go, every word you speak ( or write) or share on Facebook is being witnessed by everyone who hears' ( or see's) you claim to follow Jesus Christ. It can kill our witness to not care. I have also heard people say that they don't care what people think and that God know's their heart." God also know's that you live with the mentality of not caring what anyone think's and use it as an excuse to do, say or go wherever you please. (that one stepped on my own toes.) 

I for one want to be known by the fruit that I possess. "Either make the tree good, and his fruit good; or else make the tree corrupt, and his fruit corrupt: for the tree is known by his fruit." Matthew 12:33-37. In Jeremiah 17:8 "He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.” And again in Psalm 1:3 "He is like a tree planted by streams of water…" As Christians we are tree's and are we bearing good fruit or rotten fruit? What do the people around us think?

I care a great deal about what people think of me because of who I am representing.  If I worked for some big name company my boss's would expect that I would represent them well and with right conduct. If I was seen drinking heavily with my name tag from work on and I'm confronted about it, I couldn't give the excuse "well I don't care what people think about me or this company." It is in my job description to care. In my own life, I have worked for a Brand before that made employee's sign a form concerning our conduct on social media websites, because we were a reflection on that company by working for them. While I was at work I always had to care about what every costumer thought of me, because I was representing the brand and everyone who worked above me.

Returning again to Ephesians 5:1, we are supposed to be imitating Christ in everything we do.  The "I don't care mentality" will effect and hinder our ability to properly imitate him. Wrong thinking lead's to wrong actions.  If I don't set a standard for myself I won't follow through. We have to ditch this careless mentality and set a standard to care what people think of us. What people think of us is in large part going to be what they think of Christ or christianity as a whole. 

As my pastor said recently, Lord redirect our thoughts', redirect our speech and redirect our feet. 

Thankful Tuesday's

I'm working on themes for the different day's of the week and 'Thankful Tuesday's" keeps coming back to me today. So that will be the theme for Tuesday's. 

Today I am thankful (actually way beyond thankful) for these two bundles of complete and utter joy!!! These little blessing's are my whole life, my world and my heart walking around outside my body ( as the quote goes.) I don't have a clue why God thought I was worthy of such gift's. I am so honored to be their mommy and even more honored that God chose them for us. 

They have their moments, but they are truly rays of sunshine like seen in this picture. They are full of such love, joy and sweetness. I thank God for their hearts that already love him. I am also immensely thankful for the opportunity to be home with them every single day, loving on them, playing with them and teaching them. I can't think of a better way to spend my time.

Motherhood is a blessing and though the hardest job I've ever, ever had, it is worth it and I'm so thankful for this season! No matter how hard it gets nothing can compare to the joy in the midst of it. Last but not least I am thankful to God for being my rock every day and for the leading of the Holy Spirit. I'm thankful that in my weakness he is strong and that when I fall short he picks me up and extends forgiveness and mercy. I'm thankful for his word that revives me each day (Psalms 119) and the grace he gives me to keep on keeping on. 

When I realized that I am a brat!

Who else is really glad that a lot of times God doesn't deal with us the way we deserve to be dealt with?  Who else is thankful that with loving grace he leads us to realize our sin(s) and then accepts our apology and repentance? I know that I am!

Last week I was reading one of my favorite encouraging mommy blogs when I saw a link to another blog and the title of the post jumped out at me. It was titled "Diary of a spoiled brat." As I read her post I could relate on almost everything she was saying and it was like she had been in my head all week. A really long story short, by the end of her post I had read a beautiful story of a woman who realized how incredibly blessed she really is and she had a new perspective! She told this story...

"Last week our missionary friend Maurice (who serves endlessly and feeds nearly one hundred children every night) found a man laying limp on the side of road. Thinking he was dead, Maurice went over to search for vital signs. There was a faint hear beat so he lifted the near-death Haitian and carried him to safety. It turns out the man was starving. Malnourished and ill from years and years of living on the streets.  He was painfully poor, never having lived in a home his whole life. Maurice had little to give, but offered that he could stay in the generator shed and hung him a hammock and gave him food. The Haitian was overjoyed – completely overtaken with gratefulness because he had never in his whole life slept under a roof." The Unplugged Family. 

After reading everything before that portion of her post and then reading that, I was a mess. God started to break my heart and I sat there in tears as I realized I was a brat! I had been walking around with a stinking bad attitude for 3 days, determined to not like the change coming for our family. I wallowed in self pity and a woe is me mentality. I was angry that we were going to have to give up our beautiful home, (the one I worked so hard to make beautiful), for my husband to attend Bible college ( wow, really Tiffany??) I was angry that we are going to be moving into a house that needs work, just as this one did and isn't "move in ready." I complained and complained. I picked apart every reason why "the new house sucked." It didn't matter that it is two times as big as the house we are in now, in a good safe area and a sturdy, safe home for my family. It didn't matter that it was a huge financial blessing from God so my husband can answer the calling on his life. I deserved the wrath of God as I complained about his blessing for us and told him why I didn't like it. I deserved a spiritual spanking for my bad attitude and lack of thankfulness. However, God dealt with my gently and allowed me to read that post. I walked away broken in my sin and ungratefulness and completely thankful for a new roof over my head and running water in our sink's. Here I was complaining when a man in another country was rejoicing for a shed with a hammock. Perspective! God reminded me of the Israelite's and how they so desperately wanted out from under Pharaoh and God delivered them from his rule and performed miracle after miracle, even providing mana from Heaven and yet they complained. I want to go to the next level, but I didn't want it to be inconvenient. My beautiful mother-in-law reminded me that most of the letters Paul wrote that are in the Bible, he wrote from a prison! Perspective! And that when Paul wrote about contentment and joy, God's grace being sufficient that he either wrote it from a prison or following one trial after the other.

My joy can't be in the car I drive or the way my house look's. My joy can't be in what I possess that will burn. My joy and thankfulness don't come from what surrounds me or what the circumstance's in my life are, my joy comes from Christ! My joy comes from knowing that I'm bought and paid for by the blood of Jesus Christ and I have been saved from my former self and my old life. If my whole world washes away, I still stand saved by the Savior and filled with a daily hope and promise of an eternal life in his very presence! What more could I want, need or ask for? Perspective!

Trusting God with my ducks!

For the first time since I gave my life to Christ I was being asked to trust him in a way I was not comfortable doing. Before you even say anything, I know that isn't a right attitude. That is why I'm here writing this. My. attitude. stunk! I was completely uncomfortable trusting the Lord the way he wanted me to. Who even knew if it was going to be a season or if it was going to be my life, my whole life. I was frozen in this feeling of uncertainty and I hated it.

I am a type A personality all the way across the board! I figure out a plan and I work my plan. I'm scheduled, organized and systematic. I hate chaos, uncertainty and anything to disturb my plan. I don't like change, I don't care for riff's in the system and I don't like not having it all figured out. My ducks have to be in row! The problem is this doesn't work in the life God's called me to. My husband felt called as of last year to go to Bible college and be a pastor. What? We have two small children, he has an excellent job and he just wants to STOP in the middle of it all and veer far right into the completely unknown? This didn't jive with me, if I'm being honest, and I am...I was thankful that he is doing what he feel's called to with such conviction and sacrifice, but couldn't we just fwd and not go through the season of him getting there?? It was completely scrambling my ducks that were all sitting neatly in a row! 

Where will we live? Don't know. Where will he work? Don't know. Will I have to work part time? Don't know. Will we have to move closer to the college? Don't know. Will he have a job after school? Don't know. Will we have to move out of state for a new job after college? Don't know. 

As it was then I could answer all of those if we stayed on the path we're on. We will live in the home we have lived in since Ava Grace was 9 months old, our home. He will work where he's worked for 4 years. I won't have to work part time. The other questions would be N/A. On this path I have certainty and stability.  Now I know that no one has real certainty and stability because it can all change at the blink of an eye. See, I know this stuff but then it was head knowledge and not heart knowledge or else I would have been all on board for the adventure. Adventure, something else I don't like....

So why, knowing how I am would God call me to this?? See, I know the answer again. God cares more about our character than comfort. He loves to call his children into the unknown, desiring that we take a faith walk ( not a cake walk) as Peter did and keep our eyes on him. But I'm comfortable here on this side, I never asked to walk across water. There is that word "comfortable" again. 

So when it all boils down to it, I accepted Christ as my savior and I desire to live for him. I strive to daily bring him glory and honor. I want to move mountains in the Kingdom, but I want to always be comfortable, stable and certain at the same time. Oh and I don't want to sacrifice my ducks that are in a row! That wasn't going to work!

You know how it is when you can really feel the Lord whispering the same thing over and over again? He just continued to say "trust." "But Lord, my ducks are scrambled!!!! The next year is a blank page!" "Trust." "What if he can't find a job that allows him to go to school? Everyone is unemployed and he will join them! Will lose everything!" "Trust. Trust. Trust. Trust Trust...." I also knew that a year from now I would have some ducks neatly in a row again and some sense of a plan or certainty, but the getting there is what I was scared of. I would love to tell you that I had a breakthrough and trusted the Lord with all of it and felt much better. I would be lying. Truth is, I had a complete fit. I reacted out of fear and uncertainty and attacked my husband. I didn't act Christ like, I didn't trust and I didn't act like a Godly wife either. :-/ I went into a spiral of anger and rebellion declaring "I am not going to be a part of this." ::sigh:: Oh goodness, if given the chance I would definitely have responded instead of reacted and I would have prayed before even opening my mouth. I would do what God had been pulling on my heart to do for MONTHS and I would have trusted him. I would have trusted my husbands discernment and wisdom. I would have trusted God with my husbands heart and mind. I would have trusted that even if we fumbled on our path, God would still be in control and steady us! I would have trusted that even though it was a huge life change it was my husband answering the call to ministry and that God was all over it! Instead I blew it. I failed the test, giant F on the paper in red ink and all. :-/ Thank God for his mercy and grace and his blood that washes away our sins. It was with a repentant sorrowful heart that I had to face God and ask for forgiveness. 

Of course God has it all worked out and had a plan for us!  God knew it all along and all I had to do was trust. Now I am trusting God with all of it. I am trusting that it will all come together and work out and yes, some thing's are still uncertain, but this time I am trusting! 

It's okay, you can move my ducks!

The mommy in this picture is ME!

I say it time and time again, I LOVE to write and I aspire to blog more often and just share my life.
I am also told at least once a day to write a mommy blog. I am going to strive really hard to keep this blog updated and interesting as I face the daily JOYS  and struggles of parenting two little girl's and being the keeper of our home.

I am a mom who doesn't have it all figured out (yet) and lives day to day hanging on by the grace of God and usually with dried food on my clothes! Yep, these days my life isn't that glamorous and I must admit that I have more day's when I feel defeated then I do triumphant. However, it is in the days that I feel triumphant that I can then appreciate the defeated days, I see how it helped my character and growth in Christ. There is never a TESTimony without a TEST! It has also taught me the meaning of "My Grace is sufficient, for when you are weak I am strong." AMEN!

So this time around my blog might be a little messier, a little less poetic and a lot more nitty gritty. This is where I am at in this point in my life. I'm daily growing as a woman of God and a wife/mother and not without temper tantrums ( me usually, not the kids). I feel some day's like my life has no meaning ( ah the deceptions of the enemy!) and sometimes I would love to go find a corner and rock in it ( as long as that corner has coffee). That isn't to say that I don't have a lot of JOY in every day and that I don't LOVE this season of life I'm in. I'm just stating the fact's...it is hard, hard work to do what I do and I'm not going to lie about that. The JOY of the LORD is MY strength ( praise the Lord) and at this time in my life, God is enjoying reminding me of that!

I want to interact with my reader's, so please leave a comment below and share how God is working in your life during this season, If you're not a mom, still share! We can all use the encouragement in knowing none of us have arrived yet! (2 Corinthians 3:18)

Rain, rain go away...or not!

Talk about a gloomy day! It is one of those day's when the rain has not stopped and it look's like it is perpetually "almost dark." I confess that I do not like rainy days. I love sunshine, sunshine and MORE sunshine! I love beautiful days, warm breezes and open window's. Day's like today do not jive with me. 

However, it is not realistic to expect sunshine everyday. Though it would be cool if it only rained after dark! I could appreciate that. I am reminded that it is also not realistic to think that spiritually I won't experience rain and gloomy day's. Here lately it feel's like it has rained on me a lot spiritually. I would be lying if I told you that every time I embraced it and looked for way's to learn from it. The thing about growth in Christ is that his enemy ( and our enemy) see's our growth and amps up the attack's. He's never sneaky or cunning, he's "same old, same old" and pathetic, attacking the same way every single time. You would think that I would know how to alway's fight back by now, but still there are those day's when he clothesline's me right on my home turf! 

The lesson is in realizing where the attack is coming from and WHY! We have a very powerful God and a very real enemy that doesn't like us because we belong to CHRIST. God has been showing me more and more that my bad day's are usually an attack from the enemy. It is also NOT the people in my life but rather the enemy influencing them. 

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." Ephesians 6:12

I am beginning to understand this game the enemy is wanting to play. It is a game of deception, for if he can convince me that when I grow in Christ and draw closer to the father that I come under attack then I might take off and run. He will leave me alone if I'm complacent in my faith and not striving to mature in Christ. God, being the wonderful Father that he is- he is a lot more concerned about my character then my comfort and my faith rather then my feeling's. He allow's certain thing's to take place in order to mature me. Yes, God does allow the enemy to bother us! Anyone who tell's you different is lying to you.   If we never needed God, we would never need God! Do you get it? The blow's of life are what draw us to the Father and bring's us to our knee's. We can't give him our burden's if there are none to bare. We can't trade our ashes for beauty if there is no fire. He can't turn our mourning into dancing if there is no sorrow. 

"In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials.7These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. "

I NEED Jesus! I literally can't stand on these two feet without him! I certainly can't parent these girl's and be Jonathan's wife without him. God continually depletes me of every ounce of myself and all other resources and make's me rely entirely on him! Time and time again I try to do it on my own strength and fall flat on my face! I don't know why I even still attempt to do it without him. I'm realizing that is why I'm in this rainy season spiritually. God is trying to get me to abide, to dwell, to cast on him, to lay at his feet, to worship, to rest in his presence. I am a "do it myself" type personality and God is saying, "you're not made to do it yourself." It might seem elementary to some, but for me I am just now learning what it means to really lay my burden down at his feet and walk away and NOT go back and pick it up again. I have been guilty of returning many time's in the past. I start to think about it again and begin to worry and before I know it, I'm toting it back home.

"Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall." Psalm 55:22

The saying goes, "be careful what you pray for..." I prayed that God would empty me of myself. I prayed that as I draw near to him he will draw near to me. I prayed that he would become my absolute everything and my strength, the one I run to (first) and the answer in my struggle's. I prayed this his presence would become so real and tangible to me. I prayed that he would teach me how to rely on him.

He answered! 

So hello rainy day, I have a feeling that I will get to know you well and see a lot of you in this season. However, the GREAT thing about a gloomy day is that sunshine isn't far behind! 

"I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world." John 16:33

Do all things without complaining and whining...

I know of someone who constantly complains and mainly about their child. It upsets me, but God has used it to make me look within and ask myself, "do I ever complain like that? Do I have moments when I dwell on how much one of my girls is upsetting me and then complain about it to myself for the rest of the day?" I appreciate how God uses everything in my life to make me look at myself. "Search me, O. God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Psalm 139:23.

I am not perfect! I have definitely wasted precious time complaining about something one of my girls is doing. I've allowed time to slip past me that could have been spent cuddling while they watch the same movie for the 39749032571307501 time. At times I've let anger get the best of me and reacted in selfishness and flesh towards them. I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I realize that my babies are a gift and even in the MOST frustrating of moments, I can find something to be thankful for! I challenge myself at times to find something to be thankful for and then say it out loud! "I am thankful that we have money to pay for the diaper rash cream for your terrible rash. I'm thankful for the floor that just got covered in spaghetti o's. I'm thankful for the fact that I even have a child that is refusing to sleep. I'm thankful that God is teaching me a LOT of patience in this moment and that's shaping my character." I'm serious, you should try it! :) 

As mother's, we choose to have these completely innocent children in our arms. Our children are 100% reliant on us for their every need! We have no right to complain that they have needs. It is NOT going to be easy! Absolutely every single mother knows how tough it can be, but we just can't go on and on and on and on complaining about it. We are going to loose TONS of sleep and we are going to spend at least three...nah, (definitely more then three) years cleaning puke, pee, poop and slobber up off of ourselves and everything around us! Stuff is going to break and clothes will be forever stained and damaged. A trip out won't ever be easy again and we have to spend every waking moment thinking LESS about ourselves and MORE about the needs and wants of our blessing's. We are their world and they need us all day, every day! This happens when you have a child, there is no sense in begrudging it. Every mother has a hard time with it, no one has it worse then anyone else because each of us walk in a different set of shoes. Even if it is hard that doesn't give us the right to act that way. 

Let's try putting on thankfulness, try on some joy! Please, let's not complain. Our children will know how we feel and it won't take long for them to pick up on it. A child can hear "I love you" 100 times, but they KNOW our heart by our actions and your attitude. 

Repentance means...

"Repentance means that you realize that you are a guilty, vile sinner in the presence of God, that you deserve the wrath and punishment of God, that you are hell-bound. It means that you begin to realize that this thing called sin is in you, that you long to get rid of it, and that you turn your back on it in every shape and form. You renounce the world whatever the cost, the world in its mind and outlook as well as its practice, and you deny yourself, and take up the cross and go after Christ. Your nearest and dearest, and the whole world, may call you a fool, or say you have religious mania. You may have to suffer, but it makes no difference. That is repentance."

Love this quote and had to share!

Amazing Love

So on the eve of a rather rough day, what could possibly be more wonderful then curling up in your daughters little bed with her and reading her "The Christmas Story" and her daily devotional and ending the night with songs of praise together??? NOTHING...except if the rapture had occurred and we were in heaven doing that!

You know, its in the moments like that when I think "Really God? Why all the grace?" Does he realize what I actually deserve in my mind? I certainly don't deserve all that I have, but THANK GOD for his overwhelming grace and love filled forgiveness towards woman like me...or rather, who I used to be.

We ended the evening with "amazing love" a song we did in church today and I was getting as choked up tonight as I was during worship this morning. I encourage you to listen to it or at least read these lyrics over a few times and allow them to settle into your heart...powerful...

I'm forgiven because You were forsaken (Christ was forsaken, definition: abandoned, deserted, forgotten)
I'm accepted, You were condemned (He was condemned, definition: judged, guilty, unfavorable, sentenced, convicted)
I'm alive and well, Your Spirit is within me ( the very spirit of God is IN us)
Because You died and rose again ( we only live because he died)

Amazing love, how can it be
That You, my King, should die for me? ( Why us? he died when we were yet sinners...)
Amazing love, I know it's true
It's my joy to honor You
In all I do, I'll honor You ( do we??)

I Love....

I love that my everyday attire is usually sweat pants and t-shirts, because they have proven to almost be childproof. I also love that said childproof clothing is usually used as a rag to clean up messes as Ava Grace displayed today when she got dirt on her hands and promptly wiped it off on my pants. 


I love that when people come to our home and ask for something to drink they are usually served in sippy cups without the lid because Ava Grace has broken nearly every nice glass we owned and the one good glass left , my husband placed on top of the toaster to belt butter and cracked it. 


I love that almost all of my lip gloss’s don’t have lids because Ava Grace loves to pull them off and lose them. 


I love that occasionally when we crawl into bed we find  children’s socks and toys under our covers around our feet, I love that I slept all night on a passy and didn’t know it until morning. 


I love that almost every picture frame we own is taped on the back because its been broken by curious hands. 


I love that our washer had to be repaired because of all the tiny socks in the drum.


I love that I have to play the same children’s praise song over and over and over during our car rides. 


I love that I can’t take a shower without Ava Grace flinging the curtain back at some point and screaming “its me!”  I also love that I typically slip on bath toys left on the floor of the shower.


I love that my foot always finds that one toy we missed cleaning up as I’m walking through the living room in the dark.


I love that my refrigerator is covered in ABC magnets and scribbled drawings, long gone are the days of cute glass magnets. 


I love that almost every time I’m ready to walk out the door  I hear, “I pooped mommy”


I love that occasionally Ava Grace refuses to eat breakfast, but then sneaks bites of mine until its almost all gone. 


I love that I’ve seen THE GRINCH more times then I can count and I can quote it. (On a side note: Jim Carry is amazing!) 


I love that I can’t even go to the bathroom without an audience. 


 I love that I spent 30 minutes today scrubbing crayon marks and fingerprints of our TV screen and another 15 minutes cleaning food spots off our couch.


I love that I carry a diaper bag instead of a cute purse


I love that  EARLY every morning, while I’m in a deep peaceful sleep, I hear Ava Grace’s door swing open and bang into the wall, because Ava Grace does nothing quietly. 


I love that every time I have a hot cup of coffee ready to drink someone wakes up, needs their diaper changed, is hungry or thirsty or just wants my undivided attention and coffee is not welcome. 


I love that our computer screen displays Ava Grace’s “art show” (as she put it) of crayon scribbles. 


What I REALLY love though are the countless smiles, laughs, thank you’s, hugs and cuddles that help me to love all the hard stuff and that my entire world has been turned upside down by these two cuties and will never be the same again! 

Backseat prayer

What better way to get back on the “writing a blog bandwagon” then to share what my daughter taught me last night. 


Never underestimate two things; 1. The power of our God and 2. A two year olds ability to understand God! 


On our Journey home from “Bible Power Hour”, my husband I were arguing…yes, I just admitted to arguing following church and arguing about something incredibly stupid ,like which car to take to the airport next week! I’m a very transparent person, I find the imperfections in people and myself to be what is most beautiful because it where we see the fingerprints of God at work. As I was saying, we were arguing and our precious 2 ½ year old daughter pipes up from the backseat and says; “Jesus, help mommy and daddy right now, amen.” My husband and I both stopped  and stared at each other. I was lost for words…our argument halted and we were both quiet the rest of the way home. 


I was instantly humbled, convicted, astounded and thankful all at once. I was humbled by the faith of my small child. I was convicted by the realization that she understood our arguments and doesn’t like them. I was astounded that she knew what to do in distress, who to go to and who was capable of “fixing” it and finally, I was thankful for the heart of my daughter and the gentle ways God gets our attention. 


My husband and I don’t usually fight, we argue... like kids cause we are still working out this marriage thing and we are both selfish and stubborn at times. We have yet to realize that to be selfless and look out for the other persons best interest, is the best decision 100% of the time. We will get there, maybe in another five years haha. In all seriousness when we argue, as silly as it is, I am keenly aware that our children are present and listening. However, while they are this young I like to use the excuse that they don’t understand and can’t become effected yet, clearly Ava Grace taught me different. Being right is not worth disturbing my child’s peace in the car or the home. I want my children to have one definitive thing stand out in their memories of childhood and that is that they were raised in a peaceful environment. The topic of peace is an entirely different post for another day, but there is a way to remain peaceful amidst total chaos. Peace isn’t  found in the atmosphere, peace is found in how we respond to the atmosphere and in God's presence in the midst of the chaos.


As of last night I set my heart and mind to never argue in front of them again. Arguing isn’t always necessarily a bad thing, its how you argue, so at times we will argue. However, I pray that when we do the Holy Spirit will bring to my mind the words of my daughter during her backseat prayer. 

Hands

Thought I would share my devotion today :)


Working Joyfully
Nancy Leigh DeMoss



“It’s interesting to me that there are six references to hands in Proverbs chapter 31: verse 13, verse 16, verse 19, verse 20, and verse 31. And we have specifically here in verses 13 and 19 a woman who is getting the raw ingredients of wool and flax and is working with her hands to spin those raw ingredients into thread, and then to make fabric, and then out of that fabric to make clothing.

As we see all those references to her hands (the work of her hands, the fruit of her hands, the profits of her hands depending on which translation you’re using), so I say, what is the significance of that? And then I begin to think about other biblical references to hands, and that will perhaps be a little insight to you in your own study of God’s Word.

Biblically, there’s a special significance to working with our hands, starting with the fact that God works with His hands. Psalm chapter eight tells us that the heavens are the work of His fingers (Psalm 8:3), and when that passage is quoted again in Hebrews one, it says, “The heavens are the works of your hands” (Hebrews 1:10). Psalm 8 tells us, “You have made man,” God has made man, “to have dominion over the works of your hands” (Psalm 8:6).

This earth is the work of God’s hands. Psalm 111 tells us the works of His hands are truth and justice (Psalm 111:7). And then, we know that Jesus worked with His hands. Growing up as the son of a carpenter, it’s certain that He did labor as a carpenter with His hands. He also used His hands to be a means of blessing to others. Matthew chapter 19: “He laid his hands on the children” (Matthew 19:15). Luke 24, as Jesus was getting ready after His resurrection to be ascended back into Heaven, the Scripture says, “He lifted up his hands and he blessed them” (Luke 24:50). He blessed His disciples.

The apostles worked with their hands. First Corinthians four, the apostle Paul said, “We labor, working with our own hands” (1 Corinthians 4:12). Acts chapter 20 tells us, again Paul is speaking to the elders at Ephesus. He said, “You yourselves know that these hands have provided for my necessities and for those who were with me” (Acts 20:34).

Isn’t it interesting that the great apostle Paul who penned, I think, 13 books in the New Testament, was not above working with his hands? You see, working with our hands is the cure, the antidote, to laziness, to stealing, and to uselessness. And that’s why we read in Proverbs chapter 21 that lazy people won’t work with their hands. “The desire of the lazy man kills him,” Proverbs says, “because his hands refuse to labor. He covets greedily all day long, but the righteous gives and does not spare” (Proverbs 21:25).

Do you see the difference there? Lazy people are always wanting to get. They want to be on the receiving end. They won’t work to give. They want to get. And ultimately, if they can’t get what they want, that can even cause them to turn to stealing out of laziness. But people who are hard workers are willing to work with their hands so that they can have something to give to others. That’s the heart of this virtuous woman.

So we read in 1 Thessalonians chapter four, “We urge you,” Paul says, “that you aspire to lead a quiet life and to work with your own hands, that you may walk properly toward those who are outside and that you may lack nothing” (1 Thessalonians 4:11–12).

Now, this is serious business because Paul’s not just saying this is something you ought to consider doing, to be hard at work with your hands in whatever tasks you have that require that. He goes on to say in 2 Thessalonians chapter three that there were some in that church who were idle—they wouldn’t work with their hands. And Paul said, “Look at our example! We did not eat anyone’s bread free of charge, but we worked with labor and toil, night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you, to make ourselves an example of how you should follow us” (2 Thessalonians 3:7–8, paraphrased).

“Do not be weary in doing good” (Galatians 6:9, paraphrased). That’s a good word for mothers, isn’t it? He goes on to say, “If anyone does not obey our words, note that person, and do not keep company with him, that he may be ashamed” (2 Thessalonians 3:14). Now, that’s not only something to model in your home, but it’s an important thing to teach your children. Your children need to learn how to work, and how to have a work-ethic, but also practically how to work.

Some of you found that when you got to be wives and mothers, you did not have the practical skills that you needed to know how to meet your family’s needs in terms of food and clothing and shopping and administering and organizing your home and cleaning. Some of these skills you had to learn. And let me say, if you still don’t know how to do those things, if you don’t have the skills, find a woman who does have those skills and ask her if she would help you learn.

You say, “I’d be so embarrassed to tell a woman, ‘I don’t know how to organize my house, or I don’t know how to clean my house, or I don’t know how to cook.’” Better to be embarrassed and go and find someone who will mentor and help you learn those skills, than to go through life not fulfilling, not able to fulfill, part of God’s calling for your life.

But mothers, make sure that your daughters are learning those skills so that they won’t get to be your age and have to admit that they don’t know how to fulfill those basic homemaking and home-keeping tasks.



Well, there are so many ways that a woman in the context of her home can use her hands. I made a list of some of those, and you will think of others: sewing and mending clothes, curtains, linens. Cleaning—cleaning dishes, cleaning clothing, cleaning children, cleaning toilets, cleaning floors, cleaning spills. And there’s always plenty to do with the hands, picking up after the family, cooking, baking, food preparation, shopping, crafts that are used to make your home beautiful: painting, stenciling, gardening, planting, weeding, tending the garden.

Working with your hands: flower arranging, needle work, writing notes of encouragement—that’s a way you can use your hands to minister grace to others. And by the way, start at home with those notes of encouragement. Some of you are great at thank you notes and notes of encouragement, but do you write your husband and your children notes of encouragement?

Use your hands! Bookkeeping, that may part of your task in your home. It’s something you can do with your hands to help minister grace to your family. Caring for sick children, braiding hair, trimming hair, all kinds of fixing hair, driving children to school, to piano lessons, to sports. This woman seeks wool and flax—she looks for the raw ingredients that she needs, and then she works willingly with her hands.

Let me ask you right now to stop and look at your hands. Just look at them. If you’re a Proverbs 31 woman, or becoming one, as we are committed to becoming together, your hands may not be model’s hands. You may not have perfectly manicured nails. But let me ask you this: Are they serving hands? Are they hands that you’re using to bless and to minister in practical ways to the needs of others?

If they are, then though they may not be beautiful hands, they’re hands like the Master’s. See, Christ’s hands were nailed to a cross. He endured that, out of love, out of the heart of a servant, for the sake of the Gospel, for the sake of the plan of redemption.

Can I say that when you serve your family with your hands, when you work with your hands, when you clean and cook, whatever you do with your hands around your home, you’re doing it for the sake of the Gospel. You’re doing it so that your children may know what Jesus looks like, so they may be drawn to Him, so they may want to know Him.

There’s a wonderful word of encouragement in 2 Chronicles chapter 15. The prophet came to King Asa. Asa was a man who had a heart for God, and he was seeking to establish reform in the nations which desperately needed reforms, but it was hard work.

It would have been easy for Asa to get weary in the work and to give up. God sent a prophet to him to say what I want to say to you today. He said, “[But you, King Asa,] Be strong, and do not let your hands be weak, for your work shall be rewarded!” (2 Chronicles 15:7).



Let me say it again. Let me say it to you. “But you, be strong, and do not let your hands be weak, for your work,” if it’s done as unto the Lord, “will be rewarded!”

It will be.”

_________________________________________________________________________________

This message blessed me so much today! I wanted to share it with all of you. Just Saturday at work my friend and I were talking about how great one of our candles smelled, it just smells CLEAN and we got into conversation about cleaning our homes. I told her she may think me weird but that I love to clean. In fact one of my favorite past times in spring is to open all of my windows, put on praise music and clean my house barefoot ( there is something about being barefoot I like). I truly find joy in working with my hands around our house and now I know why, because I am doing the work of the Lord and pleasing God. Maybe its just me, but that gets me excited.


I will also note that as I read this message a song that was running through my spirit is “Potters Hands” by Darlene Zschech. I LOVE these lyrics and always have, but after reading this the song captures me in a different light.

 “Beautiful Lord, Wonderful Saviour
I know for sure, all of my days are held in your hands, crafted
into your perfect plan
You gently call me into your presence guiding me by Your Holy Spirit
Teach me dear Lord to live all of my life through Your eyes
I'm captured by Your holy calling
Set me apart, I know you're drawing me to yourself
Lead me Lord I pray


Chorus:
Take me, Mold me, use me, fill me
I give my life to the Potter's hand
Call me, guide me, lead me, walk beside me
I give my life to the Potter's hand


You gently call me into your presence guiding me by your Holy Spirit
Teach me dear Lord to live all of my life through your eyes
I'm captured by your Holy calling
set me apart, I know your drawing me to yourself
lead me Lord I pray”


I give my life to the Potters Hands to in turn pray that he will help me to use my own hands for my family, for service and for his kingdom! Have a blessed day friends :)

Listen to Potters Hands

New Season

Okay, okay I know I'm the absolute worst blogger EVER! I'm terrible at making regualr posts and I don't know why I find it so difficult conciderig I LOVE to write. ::sigh::

I admire my freind Emily who just had a baby boy and still manages to blog almost daily. Please share your secret with me Emily ;)

So the last time we met was back in Winter, back before I found out I was pregnant with our second blessing!!!!! :) Yes indeed, we are expecting our second little princess on August 12th. Little miss Addison Faith is greatly loved already!!! I can't wait to meet her. I can't wait to see how she's different from Ava Grace and how she's just alike. Jon can't wait to see what she will look like. Ava Grace is such a beauty, Addison will be too I'm sure. I have not yet gotten out all of Ava's little baby clothes, mainly because I'm lazy haha, but I'm looking forward to going back through them. One of my favorite things about having a baby girl is dressing her up and I can't wait to have two to dress up!



I'm looking forward to this new season of our life, in my life. I'm well aware it will be full of ups and downs and many challanges, but it will be full of a lot of joy as well! Children are a blessing from the Lord and I was never even supposed to have one child! It will be hard to go back to work as a manager at 8 weeks, but as long as God is my strength I will be okay. Thankfully I have a very awesome job and I can work evenings and be home with the kids during the day and I still get off early enough that I can spend ample time with Jon every night.



I know that God is preparing my heart for this new season and all it involves. It makes me laugh when almost two weeks ago God leads me to something that I feel is for this season coming and then I find out about all the changes happening and I'm in awe of how God goes before us and moves. He knows me well and my heart needed to be softened. It also helps give me peace that God is indeed in it.